Aug 25, 2010

Surviving the 1st Trimester as a Not-So-Supermom

Motherhood is perhaps the most wonderful and cherished stage of a woman's life. However, being a mother isn't always the easiest thing in the world..... especially if you are pregnant with your second child.

Second pregnancy is still special, but not as special as your first pregnancy. This time around, you are no longer a princess (boleh memanjakan diri or dimanja). You are a wife, a mother to your first born (it is more tiresome if you are still breastfeeding and your child is going thru the tantrum stage) and an oven to the bun that is growing healthily inside you.

You have a duty to make sure your household doesn't fall apart, a responsibility in mothering your child, an obligation to ensure your body is healthy for the growing foetus and most of all, ensuring that your darling husband doesn't feel neglected.

I guess Allah sahaja tahu betapa beratnya responsibility kita ni kan? Nak kena buat semua benda ni while being so tired, mabuk, cramping here and there, mood swings, no appetite and macam-macam lagi lah. Ni semua kerja durjana hormones la ni. We are not like our usual self. As for me, there are times I feel so frustrated with myself because I know I can do better or I know I can do it well if I am not pregnant, but nothing is happening.

So how are we going to perform our duty as a supermom while our hormones are shooting up to millions and being cruel to us. Here are some tips:

1) Have a strong mentality and always blame it on the hormones if things doesn't go well. I know playing blaming game is not good, but atleast it gives you a certain comfort after knowing your weakness.

2) Try not to be a control freak, as there are things we can and can't do.....and there are things beyond the control of a pregnant woman. Maybe dulu we can do a million things in 1 hour, but now it may take it a whole day or 2 to complete it. Or maybe dulu we do things in certain perfect way in the best manner, but now due to morning sickness or sakit-sakit badan, we do things less perfect. Don't sweat it, just syukur that atleast your get the job done. Work with the flow & not against them.

3) Ask (or beg) your hubby for help in completing certain chores that might be too "heavy" for you. As for me, usually I mintak hubby tolong buat laundry (no more heavy lifting for me after the spotting dulu), get groceries on the way home from work and at times bila I mabuk, I will ask him to do the cooking. Since I can't smell bahan tumis-tumis, usually I will prepare the stuff for cooking. Then I duduk jauh sikit (with tutup mulut & hidung dengan towel) while he cooks under my instruction. Tapi jangan lupa to appreciate and thank them ok? However, kalau suami tak dapat nak bantu apa-apa, mintak sajalah moral support, urut-urut skit and babysit anak while kita rest pun jadilah kan. Janji ada kita rasa that, "Yes we are functioning well as a team and in this together". Sometimes all we need is just a positive support to make the world a better place while we are having self-doubt.

4) Be comfortable. To be comfortable is to dress comfortable, to have a comfortable daily routine (plan & organize to make things easier to do) that works for a 1st trimester preggo, to do your daily chores comfortably at a comfortable pace, to have food that you are comfortable with, and many many more comfortable stuff that can help a tired/nauseated/moody pregnant mom go thru her day, without having a breakdown. It may sound mengada-ngada, but this is what works for us and the last thing we need is something stressful to add to the existing 1st trimester pressure.

These are a few stuff that works for me. How about you?


~ As ~ said...

btl tu, 2nd pregnancy tak manja sangat... tp mcm ada tanggungjawab besar yg lain, i feel u babe...

mila.ibunajihah said...

mmg besar tanggjwb seorang ibu ni kan. Strong mentality mcm yg mama-miya ckp n optimistic is most important.. moga Allah permudahkan urusan ibu-ibu semua.

yatie chomeyl said...

mmg kena selalu mintak tolon hubby kan. i ni dh beranak ni pun hari2 mintak tolon hubby buat housechores jugak hehe

Momma Mia said...

stuju tuh... me pun slalu mintak hubby tolong buat housechores juga.. semoga mama-miya sentiasa jadi supermom. Take care!!

mamanoa said...

hmm..setuju sgt...apa yg penting kerjasama..bukan hubungan intim jer yg perlu hal-hal rumahtagga n housechores ni pun kna bekerjasama gak antara hubby&wife..

hubby i b4 poser lg da bg izin, kalu xlarat xyah masak..xyah poser..xyah kemas uma,sbb dia tahu i tgh preggy & at the same time BF imran..trun naik court lagi..

bertolak-ansur & bekerjasama tu penting..

Ely Hasrul said...

i yg xpegnen nih pon umah cm tongkang pechiah, dapur yak berasap, sami comot saja2.. ya allahhh.. haha

Farah said...

i pon setuju ngan Ely..rasenye i ni pregnant ke tak pregnant ke umah still serabut sebab ade tukang sepah hahaha.

stay strong dear! hopefully semua berjalan lancar dan dipermudahkan.

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Disclaimer: I am not a medical doctor nor am I a lawyer. I am not a scientist nor am I an expert. I am just a wife and a mother, who is putting her thoughts and findings in a blog. All of the posting on this website & my blogs were written by me for educational purposes and as my sentimental library, but are not meant to diagnose nor treat any medical disorders. Any other materials that I may have quote from other published materials are for educational purposes only and not for any other manipulative reasons. Anyway, whatever weird stuff that I published are the real stuff that I believe works for me. Tips and tricks that might work for me. You are free to put it in your head if you thinks its valuable, but if you think its rubbish... Please don't mock me. Do please shut your pie hole.
FUCK YOU UP!!! son of a bitch